Mk 12:28-34
28One of the scribes, when he came forward and heard them disputing and saw how well [Jesus] had answered [the Sadducees], asked him, “Which is the first of all the commandments?” 29Jesus replied, “The first is this: ‘Hear, O Israel! The Lord our God is Lord alone! 30You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ 31The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”
32The scribe said to him, “Well said, teacher. You are right in saying, ‘He is One and there is no other than he.’ 33And ‘to love him with all your heart, with all your understanding, with all your strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself’ is worth more than all burnt offerings and sacrifices.” 34And when Jesus saw that [he] answered with understanding, he said to him, “You are not far from the kingdom of God.” And no one dared to ask him any more questions.
Hear, O Israel! The first of all the commandments is the love of God. And the second is the love of neighbor and self. But to be able to love God and neighbor you must first listen. The root of many of our conflicts, I believe, is that we do not know how to listen to one another. We want to dictate, to presume, and to be heard. We know what we want and what should be done. We think we know the problem. All the things we know will mean nothing if they are not based on what we have heard in the first place. Let us listen to the plans of God and the pleas of people. Then loving them will be easy.
A couple I knew had a serious fight one Christmas. When called to mediate, I asked them to listen to each other. Before one could react, one had to repeat verbatim what the other had said to be sure that one listened and got the side of the other. Sure enough, after listening carefully, they found out that what they were fighting about was a small matter and could be resolved easily.
We all know about love. We need to listen first to be able to love.